My Beautiful Michaela

Today I had all kinds of thoughts and feelings running through my mind. I have this wonderful daughter that is a sophomore in high school this year. She's one of six children that I have and each one is special in their own way. I remember the day I found out I was pregnant with Michaela. I was so nervous and scared about being a parent. I had that feeling of not being ready. I had so many things I wanted to do before I became a parent and I was so unsure of myself. Then the Dr.'s appts began and my heart fell in love with her the first time I saw her. Everyone, including the Dr. thought she was a boy. Deep down in my heart, I wanted a girl. I was afraid if I didn't have my girl first, I would never get one. There is something very special about a daughter. The day she was born was amazing. The Dr. told us she was perfect, she was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. I loved her from that moment.

Children have this unique way of becoming your whole life the instant they become yours. God gave me this precious gift to take care of and I was so scared about being responsible for this special gift.

She will be 16 years old in June and just today left for her first mission trip. This trip is a big trip for our daughter. She will decide if this is what she wants to do with her life. I'm excited and overwhelmed all at the same time. I love that she wants to dedicate her life to God's service and to taking care of his children. I am very proud of her. I am also very selfish. I'm learning that like Mary the Mother of Jesus, I have to let her go and allow her to be who God created her to be. This is very difficult, because I know that I only have a few years left before her wings will fly and she will leave her home.

As a mother I would love to keep her here and shelter her and protect her from all of life's aches and pains. Like any mother I would love to spend the rest of my life taking care of her, but I know she must go. It is so hard to take the responsibility of becoming their protectors, life-givers, comforters, and shelters only to come to the end and allow them the freedom to choose.

At the same time, I am comforted in the fact that Michaela knows who she belongs to and knows who is her guide and her true life-giver. I am so thankful that I know she will seek the will of her father and his refuge in her time of trouble. I am thankful that she will stand for what is important and become the woman that God intended her to be.

Thank you Father in Heaven for giving me such a precious gift. Guide her steps and continue to be the light in her life. Bless her relationships and friendships in her life and give her the joy she desires in her heart. I love you!!!!